Brain Stew

Words. Ideas. Pushing into my brain. 
I can't handle all the voices and opinions whirling across the table around me.
I want to scream, or at the very least block my ears and shut the static out. 
There comes a point when information is too much. 
I need time to absorb it all. Words. Memories.

Jillian, I love you. 
Jillian, you're stupid.
Jillian, I miss you. 
Jillian, we haven't talked in a year.
Jillian, you've changed.
Jillian, you keep too much pain inside.
Jillian, where are you? 
Jillian, how could you have left me without saying goodbye?
Jillian, what are you hiding from?

I can't take it anymore.  

I need to walk away. 

Push my chair out from the table. 

Slip around the corner.

Why do you love me?
I know how stupid I am.
You have no idea how much I miss you.
But when we talk we never say anything.
We all change, look at you.
It's better than exploding.
I don't know where I am or where I'm going.
You have no idea how much walking away killed me.


  1. How did you get to be so brilliant?

  2. I agree with Katie above.

    Nicely written.

    So many times I have felt the same way.

  3. Beautiful. Nothing else to say.

  4. *stands and claps.
    That one moistens the eyes. Amazing.


  5. i like talking to myself... makes me clear up things somehow. you are amazing, dear. thank you for this post <3

  6. Optimus Rhyme. You have madskillz.


"Sometimes the world seems like a big hole. You spend all your life shouting down it and all you hear are echoes of some idiot yelling nonsense down a hole"
_Adam Duritz

I love hearing things that aren't my own pathetic echoes.