Silence can be such a beautiful thing.
I've been talking less and less lately, and honestly, I love it.

Taking sign language this semester, and thinking about how much people say without ever opening their lips.
Speaking has everything to do with how you say it, and very little to do with the actual words.
Words lie, facial expressions lie, eyes can lie too. 
But if you get really silent, and just look around and watch, you can see things that you've never seen before.
I'm finding that it also makes me want to say more meaningful things when I do speak.

Okay, I had a ridiculously huge grin on my face when I saw this.
It reminds me so much of my 14 year old brother,
who also happens to be my best friend. He's pretty awesome.
And whenever I do something like put skim milk in my coffee, or skip lunch, or just pick at a salad, he'll grab my wrist, roll his eyes and say in exasperated voice "JACE! You are not fat!"
It's pretty funny. But yeah, he's the best. Although, lately people have been asking if he's older than me.... Does this face honestly look 16?????
Interesting thing, he was messaging back and forth with Georgie Henley, who acts Lucy Pevensie in the Chronicles of Narnia films last weekend. 
I read one of her messages, and she called Sam "so sweet". *gag* you can't unread what's been read >:P

I need to get this tee shirt and wear it for Emma's sake:
Since she tends to be one of the more apathetic people in my life.

Also on my want list
 (AKA "You are a stupid brat who has too many things handed to you Jillian Christine" list)
Is this:

I am obsessed with anything Wonderwall.
That Oasis song is brilliant.




Have  you ever been in a {purely hypothetical *rolls eyes*} relationship that's lasted a really long time, 
and each of you have made so many mistakes that you can't really blame one solitary person,
because it truly is both of your faults that things ended up the way they are, 
so the two of you cover everything up desperately, until all the cracks start to show up?

And then you are faced with a choice.
The choice of whether or not to actually fix things, 
or to forget everything entirely and move on.

And you choose to move on, even though it kill every cell inside of your heart.
Because love makes you weak. 
It makes you inebriated. Silly. Vulnerable. High.
And just suppose, you really appreciate consistency.
So you build up a high wall around your heart, and lock him... er.... the other person out, 
in an effort to make yourself invincible. 
But they take it wrong, and you just end up hurting them more by avoiding them.
Until one day they up and leave you with a ghost of what both of you were together.
I was wrong. I loved him just enough to care.


                                                 
Reading this book. It's pretty good so far. I'm about 100 pages in. 100 out of 300 that is.
The main character's name is Finn, and she is a girl, which reminded me of a convo with Sara about the fact that if I was born a boy, my name would have been Finn. 
In the book, her full name is Finley, 
and my almost nickname Finn would be short for Phineas. 
Finn is a cool name. Sort of bummed.
Anyway, if you want a book summary, click here.




Wow, 137 followers! Who would have ever thought? I can't even imagine how we got here. 
Well, than you all. Your comments are such a huge inspiration. I wish I could be a better follower to everyone :( 
I'll work on it.

6 comments:

  1. I LOVE Napoleon Dynamite!!!! That movie was so hilarious!

    Um, ha hem, back to the serious stuff...

    I don't know how you churn out all of these interesting posts with such consistency. Unless you're a witch or a goddess. That's much more plausible.

    ReplyDelete
  2. 1 - Napoleon Dynamite is pure genius :))
    2 - Your brother seems awesome. And hahaa, i sorta have the same situation. My brother is two years younger than me (im 15) and people think that he's out of high school. HE'S AN 8TH GRADER. it's ridiculous.
    3 - I really want that Wonderwall band thingy tooo. I love Oasis.
    4 - Love your blog!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Jills,
    Only you could write a post with so many sections and ideas, like it was really 6 posts, and have no one get bored. It was like a Paper Tigers Christmas morning. :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Christopher-
    Yes, it's very funny.
    Actually, I've been really uninspired lately, and I think I'm coming out of my funk. Um, no, I am not aware of being either a witch or goddess, but thanks for the compliment. But back at you! Your posts are always interesting.

    Rae-
    Little brothers are awesome, but I don't really get where people get these assumptions from.
    Heh, I'll just give up the oldest child responsibilities I suppose.
    Oasis = awesomeness.
    Thank you!

    Sara-
    That comment made me smile.
    I was having all these bloggy thoughts last night, and I was debating whether to separate them or not, but it all sort of flowed together into one random piece, like a mosaic.
    MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

    ReplyDelete

"Sometimes the world seems like a big hole. You spend all your life shouting down it and all you hear are echoes of some idiot yelling nonsense down a hole"
_Adam Duritz

I love hearing things that aren't my own pathetic echoes.